Material possessions run modern society. These possessions come down to technology, and technology today comes down to just one rectangular piece of metal (or plastic, if you live in China). That’s right folks; one piece of metal the size of your hand runs our entire population. Seven billion people. One piece of metal. We call it the “smartphone”.
Imagine if every single smartphone in the existence of Earth disintegrated in the same fire as in Anne Bradstreet’s poem, “Upon the Burning of Our House”. Our relationships between each other could no longer be formulated over the Internet. Life would be turned upside down.
On Thursday of last week, tragedy struck the Yeskey household: I broke my own smart phone. Oh, my precious Samsung Galaxy S4! (Yes, you heard correctly. I’m in the minority here with a Droid). My S4 squealed as it leapt out in front of me, hitting the hard, tile floor face-first. Upon picking it up, I discovered, to my terrible dismay, that its screen would no longer turn on. Black forever, like the hole where my heart used to be.
Just three days without the device has caused a significant amount of strife in my daily life.
First, I missed a notification from my work that my shift had been cut for the night. The struggles of a slow Sunday scooping frozen yogurt… I swear. Not only had I planned my entire day around going to work, but so did my dad, because he had to drive me. Sorry Pa.
Second, my homework has taken double the amount of time to complete. Without quick Google searches for definitions of words or diagrams of mitosis, my entire weekend became engulfed in academics.
Third, I have been forced to take a step back in time to the ages of the cave man and use an alarm clock to wake up in the morning. The sound of incessant beeping is forever engrained into my brain.
Fourth, I can’t Twitter stalk. Or Instagram stalk. Or Facebook stalk. What am I supposed to do with my life?
Fifth, I have to type this blog on a “computer”, using oddly shaped buttons called a “keyboard”. Such a strange contraption it is. Not to mention it's just about as fast as a sloth with chained legs trying to walk through a pool of straight-up honey.
Sixth, seventh, eighth, ninth, tenth… The list goes on forever like the blackness of my S4 screen. Luckily, I have insurance on my phone, and I will be getting a replacement in the mail tomorrow. Life will go on! I will survive!
. . .
And this is what society has come down to. Material possessions --> Technology --> Smart phones --> Psychotic, human interaction-deprived, sore-eyed teenagers with faces lit up by the artificial light that radiates from their smart phones. Whatashame.
Wow there is so much detail. I also like when you said " tragedy struck the Yeskey household." It makes it really dramatic and funny. Great Job.
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'm just really tired but it took a good minute to figure out what your title said because of the font! Anyway, I agree that today's society is becoming more and more centered around technology. I have seen several articles on how, despite being more 'connected' by the internet and technology, people are becoming more and more separated and lonely. The smartphone is a good example of this impact, but is still just a small portion in the advancement of technology.
ReplyDeleteI will first start off by saying that your post is utterly hilar-lar (A new phrase for hilarious that I invented). Good job. I smiled and giggled like the 12-year-old girl that I secretly am. Also, dude, I feels your pain. And Galaxy S4, nice! Anyway, I can also relate with how technology is permanently entwined in our lives. Imagining a day of what you must have had to struggle through is already giving me a headache. I know that I'm part of a deprived generation that is entertained solely through a little black box, but oh, how that little black box entertains. "Whatashame."
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